Welcome to the Hickstionary, a landing spot for all things H family.
I'm Heidi. He's Rusty. And together we have our beautiful babe, Beckett and a furry menace, Dakota.
I mostly use this space to brag about how awesome the kid is, whine about how naughty the dog is & share an occasional deep thought.
Thanks for hanging out with us as we figure out this [blessed] life!

If you are looking for my photography blog (where words don't tend to fall out of my mouth nearly as freely), visit {captured by} heidi.

Monday, November 30, 2009

Attn: Prayer Warriors

UPDATE (11/30): I don't have much to say. Just wanted to update you on Deb. Please, please, please, be praying for this boy and his family.

John Noll's mother, Deb Noll, passed away this past weekend after battling with cancer.

There is a visitation from 5-7 tonight at Steven's funeral home

The funeral is tomorrow at 10:00 a.m. at St. Cecilia




---------------------------------------------------

Please, please, please, keep Deb Noll in your prayers. Some of you may know her through the business department at ISU. I know her because her son, John, was in my homeroom last year. She was an amazing homeroom mom. She kept us supplied throughout the year, often making trips to the school to deliver needed materials, other times sending them with John. She is a great mom and it is very evident that she cares deeply about not only her son, but all the children in our district.
She has been diagnosed with ovarian cancer (which hits close to home for my family) and the Dr.s' report is not good.
I am especially heartbroken over this because John is her family. She adopted him and has been raising him on her own. I remember a time she had to be gone last year and needed a friend to come in to take care of him. I'm sure she is worried more about him at this point than she is herself.

If you are willing/able to help there is a walk Oct. 10th at Ada Hayden Park at 9am. If you email me today (heididh33@hotmail.com), I can get you signed up to walk with my group ($20 for t-shirt, $10 without).
If you'd like more information on how you can help them in other ways, please email me and I'll get that to you as well.
(Update: On the right column of this ISU page, there is a little information about the walk.)

Even if you are not able to help them financially, please storm Heaven's door on their behalf; I know they would more than appreciate your support.

___________________________________________________________

Prayer Wall

Saturday, November 28, 2009

A Thanksgiving Day Photo Op...


....too bad Maddox didn't agree! (Poor thing was cold!)


Happy Thanksgiving!

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Mom's Strawberry Pretzel Salad

In honor of Thanksgiving, a food post. Okay.... also because I used the free 8x8 Shutterfly code (THANKS, JEN!) to make the first 'Orange Pantry Cookbook', a dessert edition. Here is one of Rusty's favorites.

My mom's strawberry pretzel salad:




1 stick margarine
1/2 cup sugar (granulated)
2 Cups crushd pretzels

SECOND LAYER:

1 Cup Sugar ( I use powdered)
12 oz Cool Whip
8 oz Cream Cheese (softened)

TOP LAYER:

2 Cups Hot Water
2 (3oz.) pkgs strawberry Jello
2 (16 oz.)pkgs. frozen strawberries

For the crust, melt margarine and dissolve sugar in it. Add crushed pretzels. Mix and pat in 9x13 pan. Bake at 350 degrees for 10 minutes. Cool. For the second layer, mix sugar, cream cheese and Cool Whip. Spread over cooled crust. Chill while making top layer. For the top layer, dissolve Jello in hot/boiling water. Add frozen strawberries and mix. Let partially set. Pour over second layer and refrigerate.

Is It Enough?

In case you were worried I had a big head after you read my last post, I'll knock myself down a few notches for you (The truth is I can't wait for Beth's "So Long, Insecurity" book to come out, and for the simulcast at the Ridge on the 24th...... but I'll save that post for another day...).

God has put a lot of people in my pathway in the last year that are struggling with forgiveness. He's let me listen to nearly a dozen people recently that are having a hard time forgiving someone that's hurt them. People that they work with, people that they used to be friends with, people that they love. He has filled the silences I've shared with those people. He's been in the tears I've shared with them. And He's given me the words that come from my own journey of forgiveness.

I was beginning to think that my struggles of forgiving people in the past (as recently as six months ago), was to use me to help others through that process.

I had read a book that said "You know you've forgiven someone when you think of them and don't feel anger or hurt. You feel pity. You pray for them." I was there (I still am) with so many of the people I've had to work at forgiving. I thought I was doing pretty good....

But. He isn't finished with me yet.



"But Esau ran to meet him, and embraced him, and fell on his neck and kissed him, and they wept." Genesis 33:4

You see, when Esau had been hurt deeply by Jacob, he didn't just forgive him...

.....he embraced him.

He was hurt by Jacob. He was in mourning.

"Blessed are those who mourn, For they shall be comforted." Matthew 5:4

He was in mourning and he was comforted. He let go of his bitterness and was set free. His heart was made whole.

It wasn't enough for him to forgive Jacob. Forgiveness alone is not complete. Forgiveness is about the past. Healing is about the now. Is about the future.

We. need. healing.

"The Spirit of the Lord is upon Me, Because He has anointed Me to preach the gospel to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted..." Luke 4:18

He was sent here to do much more than help me to forgive. He is here to heal me. Here to give me life to the fullest. Here to make me whole.

And He's here to do all of that for you too.

Lord, I recognize my brokenness. I recognize my vulnerability. I see that I'm not living life in full like You have planned for me when I merely forgive. Lord, lift me up. Hold me close to You. Take away the pain that's still there. Put back together the shattered pieces. Give me life to the fullest like only You can give. I need You. I love You. Amen.

note: If you are in the same week of the Esther study as me, you may be wondering how this ties in.... It doesn't directly.. but last week as Haman was begging Esther for his life, one of my sweet Esther sisters asked if Esther should forgive him. If Esther should give him another chance. We talked about how we are to be Christlike and how that fits into our lives. I realized I have forgiven people but I still keep them at arms length. I was (okay am) following Proverbs 4:23 pretty literally and wondering if I'm following it too literally. The following Sunday (two days ago), Pastor Mike was talking about Esau and Jacob. I have a lot of "Jacobs" in my life I need to embrace... Which brought me to the above post....

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

I am great (no really, I am)

So remember how I mentioned yesterday my head was spinning a million directions after last night's Esther study?
One thought I was trying to wrap my mind around was "Haman stepping off."
As a little background reminder, Haman is the "villain." He sentences all of the Jews to death (Esther is a Jew).
Haman is interested in fame, in honor, in power.
He wants to do great things and to be someone great.
The entire time I've read about him, I've thought what an awful person, who could live like this?

But the truth is, I'm not always that different from him.

Growing up, I wanted to stand out, I wanted to be different. I liked being known, I liked feeling in control and I liked feeling like I had the power.
Okay, so it's not at all on the same scale as Haman. I wasn't seeking control over an entire country, just wanted to be the president of my class, of most of the organizations I was in, and the United States of America (okay that last one hasn't happened yet but the dream was there...).
I basked in the 'glory' of awards and honors. I loved being elected a state officer and named a state "student of the year." Then, as an adult, in my first "real" job, I loved being named a national "outstanding educator of the year" my first year on the job.
It wasn't until I took another position and didn't receive an award that I realized I had been feeding off of them.
I liked the "honor" and the "glory." I liked the attention. I liked the feeling of being appreciated.
I felt like I was doing something great. I thought I was going to be someone great.
Sadly, I thought that receiving awards was a great measure of success to show that I truly had become someone great.

But.

The truth is, I was wrong.

(I know. You're shocked. But it's true... )

as much as I hate to say it..... I. was. wrong.

The glory isn't mine. I didn't do any of that. I don't deserve any awards. I didn't earn a single one of them.

It's. all. His.

He did that. He worked through me. He even blessed me with some awards along the way, as undeserving as I was am (yeah, I'm guessing he knew I needed a confidence booster at the time).

You see, it's not the awards, the titles, or the honors that make us great. And while we are called to the fame of Jesus, it's not our glory. It's His. It's all His.

He doesn't want us to do a million things for His kingdom (which is good, because I'm guessing I cant). That's not what makes us great in His eyes.
But I can do a few.

I can stop being afraid of being mediocre and stop trying to do great things.
I can allow myself to be great in Him. Just like he wants me to.

At after school club tonight, the students were working on a building challenge. Part of their points came from how high they could build their tower to hold a golf ball. Another part of their points came from being able to knock the golf ball out of the work area at the end. They were focused on getting the highest number of points possible for the highest tower. According to the points the tower could be 60" tall. They decided they wanted to make it as tall as they could, their goal being 60" tall. The big problem was that they didn't have 60" of materials to work with in the first place and even if they stretched the materials as tall as they could to build a tower, it wouldn't be sturdy enough to support a golf ball. Having focused all of their energies on this goal, when the timer went off, they had no tower and hadn't even set up the golf ball to attempt to get the second part of their points.
You see, while they were trying so hard to do great things, they were disqualified for not even completing the small task.

Lord, please help me to be great in You. Help me to set my focus on using the gifts You give me and doing what You would have me to do. Don't let me be so focused on doing something great that I forget about all of the small tasks that make me great in You. Please remind me (often) that being great in You is not the same as being great by the world's standards. And thank You so much that it's not! Amen.

Monday, November 16, 2009

How?

Just got home from Esther study. My head is spinning in a million directions. I'm not sure if it is from 'Session Seven Viewer Guide" or from the new trimester starting tomorrow (or maybe I'm way off and it's from the shot the dentist gave me tonight....).

I digress.

Esther is coming to a close. In two more weeks, we'll wrap up. We are starting "Turn Arounds" this week. In chiastic structure form, we'll be looking at the "It's tough being a woman...." scenarios and turning them around.

Turn Around Scenario #7
It's tough being a woman who feels responsible for the "how."

Um. Yeah. Just a little bit. Am I alone here? Do you ever feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders? Like it is up to YOU to figure out where to go from here? Like you need to be the peace keeper, the decision maker, the doer? Do you feel the need to be in control? to work it? to make it work? Dare I ask, do you ever feel like you need to play God?

Maybe it's just me... but I often feel responsible for the "how." Ask Rusty, he'll tell you that he is the thinker and I am the doer. "Let's do this and get it done. Let's make this work. Let's go this direction."

But guess what?

(I know you are going to be shocked!)

We're not! We're not responsible for the how! It's not our job!

"The Lord knows how to rescue the godly from trials and to keep the unrighteous under punishment until the day of judgment." 2 Peter 2:9

"For He knows how we are formed, He remembers that we are dust." Psalm 103:14

Did you catch that?

"The Lord knows."

"For He knows."

I will not fret my way to victory. But TRUSTING in Him, HE will take care of the HOW. Because HE already KNOWS.


Lord, thank You for taking care of the 'how.' Thank you for holding me safely in your arms and giving me rest while you work it out. Lord, I trust in You. I believe You. I will wait for You. This is all Yours, God. I'm giving it over to You. Amen.

Basketball

High School Basketball Season starts today.
Yes, that means our lives will be a bit different, a bit hectic, okay, a bit chaotic, until March.
No, I could not imagine life without Rusty coaching basketball.

He loves it. He's passionate about it. He's good at it.

Good luck this season to R and all of the other basketball coaches in our lives. May God use you to teach those boys a little about how to be men both on and off the court.
And to all of the fellow coaches' wives, I pray God will be with you and give you lots of extra patience through the season. (And be sure to call me, you know I'll be around!)

Go Bombers!

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Have I Worn You Out Yet?

After a busy (fun and rewarding) weekend, I'm catching up on one last day of Esther study before tomorrow's session.

I just read a sentence I needed to hear.

"God is never afraid of us or worn out by us!"

As in, when we go through emotional struggles (sometimes long, unbearable, ongoing, seemingly never ending), our friends and family can grow weary of going through those struggles with us.

But He never grows weary. He's not afraid to take that journey with us and He's not worn out by us.

Thank You, Jesus for sticking with me through it all!

And thank you to my good friends that also stand by my side, even though I can wear you out!

Saturday, November 7, 2009

November Blessings

Is it really November already??
I mean I know we've already had Halloween but it is Sunny and 70 (almost) today! So it's hard to believe that it is already November! Basketball hasn't started (yet) and I have barely finished any of my November projects (okay I've only finished one) so it cant really be November already, can it?!?

If you know me well, you know I have a lot of project ideas that never get carried out... one of those is the "Blessings Jar" I was on a mission to make at the start of last year (I'm still looking for one). And while I think it is important to count and record our blessings EACH day of the year, it's definitely a must do in November.

I saw a blessings calendar somewhere (Pottery Barn Kids, maybe?) made of cloth and super intricate. I had big ideas of embroidering one just like it. Well since we are already (almost) a full week into November that plan fell through and a quick(er) project emerged.

Meet the Hicks family Blessings Calendar:
(Okay, I realize the sun makes it hard to see, but it says "A Month of Blessings" at the top (with some scripture following) and "Happy Thanksgiving" at the bottom. If you click on the picture to see it larger, it's easier to see.)
The idea is for each of us to write something specific we are thankful for on the slips of paper in each pocket. At the end of the month, we'll go back and read them all.

And now I gotta go... Rusty REALLY wants to take advantage of the beautiful weather and get to the game early today for tailgating. Go Cyclones (although yes, Amy, I think your Cowboys will win today!)!!!!

Oh- and today, I'm thanking God for warm & sunny weather, Cyclone football, and time with R!
What are you thankful for?

Update: I saw another example on {in}courage: Check it out here.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

His Unfailing Love

And You never change
God You remain

The Holy One

My Unfailing love

Unfailing love



You never change, God. You remain.

Early in the Esther study, Beth talks about feeling like

God

is

so

far

away.



When God feels far away,

it's easy to feel

alone.
discouraged.
exhausted.
overwhelmed.

Sometimes life just stinks. There's struggles at work, at home, with family, with friends, and everywhere in between. Sometimes I feel like I'm a terrible wife, horrible sister, bad aunt, awful friend, lazy teacher, and not to mention a lacking Christian. When life gets hectic, when things get crazy, it's easy to question God. It's easy to ask Him where He's at in all of this.
But His answer is always the same,

"Right here."

We are told time and time again in His Book that He will never leave us.

"No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you." -Joshua 1:5

He is always here. Always by my side.

When I'm stressed to the max and don't take time to read my Bible, He's here.
When I'm running late in the morning and don't read my daily devotion, He's here.
When I'm too sick to get out of bed to go to church, He's here.
When I'm angry with Him and lacking in prayers of thanksgiving, He's. still. here.

He doesn't change. When I feel far away from Him, it's not Him that's moved, it's me. He's always the same. He always remains. He's always good.


He will never leave me nor forsake me.

And He wont you, either.


He will never change
He will remain

He's the Holy One

He's my Unfailing love

Unfailing love



"'Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,' says the LORD, who has compassion on you." -Isaiah 54:10


Lord, there are times I feel so far away from you. Times I feel like I'm failing in everything. Times I feel like I'm just grasping to whatever I can to keep from falling farther and farther away. During those times, even when I cannot feel You, I know You are there. You are there to hold me, there to carry me. You love me. You love me with an unfailing love that I cant fully comprehend. Thank You for remaining steadfast. For never changing. For always loving me. Thank You for Your unfailing love. Please help my heart to always feel the warmth of Your unfailing love, Lord. Amen.



("Unfailing Love" by Chris Tomlin: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k_MyC6kJzPg )

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Flowers in Her Hair


Happy Halloween!

Yes, we are heathens and did some Halloween activities. Secretly (okay, not so much a secret anymore) I love Halloween. I love the costumes (even though I don't dress up), the candy (even though I eat too much), the fall activities (even though that means it's getting COLD here).
I don't care if you call it a Fall Festival or Halloween or whatever. I love it. Do you?

Mummy treats for the kiddos:

Friday was beggars night in the P family's town. R & G had a basketball clinic to go to so I headed over and A made me some awesome dinner and we took the boys out on a cold, wet, windy trick-or-treat night.

Morgan met us for awhile in her Supergirl costume (I didn't get a picture) but headed home early. I don't blame her! (We weren't sure if she would show up as Supergirl, Raggedy Ann, or Tigger. She had lots of outfits to choose from this year!)

You can guess which of the boys' costumes was my favorite, but they both made good football players:


Saturday, the men still had basketball so A & the boys came over for the afternoon. They painted their shelves, painted pumpkins, & made nutter butter ghosts. We had a few more activities that we didn't even get to. R was disappointed we didn't even carve a pumpkin because he wanted the pumpkin seeds. Is it okay to carve a pumpkin now that it's November? (Maybe with the letter H or something?)




Our town's trick-or-treating was that night. The boys had the cutest outfits. I LOVE the book "Where the Wild Things Are" and cant wait to see the movie (maybe when we can rent it!). They helped pass out candy to all the trick-or-treaters. They did a great job!

Did you "celebrate" Halloween?

Slumber Party: Maddox Style

Maddox, his mommy, and 'Doo doo' came up last weekend.
Holly & I met Hillary Saturday morning for the Race for the Cure then went dress shopping.
Since Rusty & I had forgotten to take Maddox's Birthday football to him on his actual birthday, he got to open it when he was here. I've never seen a little boy so excited about a football.
We also were watching reruns of Oprah and Maddox was doing the flash mob dance with them. He was so cute. He'd do every move then at the end say, "Again, again!" Thanks for the fun times buddy!


(The dance he was doing: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2yBFbAm8sQE )
(The quality on this one isn't the greatest. The original video I had posted was taken down due to copyright issues. If you haven't seen it and this link doesn't work, go to Youtube and search Oprah I Got A Feeling. It's so cool!)

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