Emotionally.
Personally.
Deeply.
It hurt.
A lot.
I've been physically attacked before. In many ways, that seemed easier to deal with.
The last few weeks I've been quiet. withdrawn. sad. (and if you ask my husband, grouchy. thankfully no one asked him. ahem.)
The morning of the attack, I had a pow-wow with God. I told Him He reminded me that morning that I knew He was the same God today as He was yesterday and would be the same God tomorrow.
You know how those days usually go.
So at the end of the day all God had to say to me was, "You do know I'm the same God, right?"
uhhhh.... yeah.
"This is not unto death, but for the glory of God, that the Son of God may be glorified through it."
How?
I'm in pain. I really don't see how this is glorifying Your kingdom.
I
just.
don't.
get.
it.
And I didn't. For a long time.
I cried. I whined. I complained.
And then one day I started praying.
I stopped praying for Him to take away my own pain and started praying for them.
I started praying that they may know Him. Really know Him. As much as I was hurting, I'm going to venture a guess that they were hurting more.
It's not about me. And it never was.
